Diary the577

40 Miles to Oregon

So tonight I finished my calibration sets, which means tomorrow will be my first official run!

I originally proposed to run 50 miles before the Oregon Reunion, but cuz it took so long for my SportBand to get here, I'm gonna have to cut down that goal to 40 miles. I know, I know...40 miles in 8 weeks isn't much at all -- that comes out to 1 mile per day, 5 days a week 'til 4th of July -- but really my short-term goal is to be able to jog a full mile non-stop.

I've been in this position before. In 6th grade, I was a chubby kid that would eat two hot dogs & fries everyday for lunch, struggling to not be the slowest guy in my class. In 7th grade, I was convinced by Mike H. to join cross-country for fun. By 9th grade, I ran my best mile at 6:48 minutes and was just 2 inches shy of getting the Presidential Physical Fitness Award.

I've done it before. I know I can do it again.

Anyways, you'll be able to track my progress with this little widget that'll be plastered on my blog:

In other news, James hit me up earlier tonight and told me www.nikeplus.com has restocked on the new SportBand, so order yours today while you still can!

Once you get yours, here's a few things you should expect:

  • You need to calibrate your SportBand in two separate sessions -- one for walking, one for running. Reason being you can only calibrate from your last session.
  • Do the walking calibration at a track, sync it with your computer and make note of the exact distance you completed.
  • Do the same as above but with you running the whole way.
  • These two calibrations must be over 0.25 miles (i.e. one lap around the track). I suggest doing at least 0.375 miles (one-and-a-half laps) so you don't get the dreaded "your last run was not good enough" error.
  • After calibration, the sensor will know when you're walking and when you're running.
  • You can do multiple sessions before you sync it with your computer.
  • You can pause in the middle of a session if you really, really, really need to.
  • There is no backlight on the SportBand, which kinda sucks if you plan on running at night like me.

That should help you get started. Lemme know when you get yours! In the meantime, starting tomorrow, I'll be working on my 40 miles.

Happy trails!

Diary the577

Weekend in NorCal?

Cathy: i would love you guys to come out
Cathy: you could all share a rm or something
Cathy: and we could eat our hearts out in berkeley for aday!
Mel: hahahaha
Mel: that'd be the plan.....
Mel: 1. eat @ berkeley
Mel: 2. see cathy
Cathy: dude
Cathy: no the plan is 1. eat food w cathy
Cathy: ...
Cathy: thats it
Mel: oh.
Mel: yeah, that works too

Diary the577

Reunion Cruise '07

The last time I went on a cruise was over 10 years ago with my family. I was barely 15, not even close to the legal drinking age, even by international waters standards. Regardless, I had an absolutely amazing time. And ever since then, I had dreamed of going on a cruise with the UDH crew. Unlimited food. A whole lot of booze. Beautiful islands. All with my closest friends. What more could I ask for?

Although a bunch of people had to back out, a handful of guys were able to make it and make history.

August 17, 2007 (1 Day Prior)

Everybody's here!! Even Coal and Finley!

After an awesome lunch at Talia's, we go our separate ways to chill / do errands.

I spend the whole afternoon checking the Hurricane Watch on my iPhone. Hurricane Dean was sweeping through the Caribbean and there was a good chance our cruise would get canceled or postponed. Luckily, our trip is kept on schedule, though rerouted through the Eastern Caribbean instead of the Western.

A few hours later, we meet up at the Shaner's for some awesome homemade gooking. While people get ready, we lounge around and watched the Aramco Brats' Story DVD. Later on, some of us went to good 'ol Funkey Nutz while the rest of us stuck around for some hookah and drinking games.

During a round of King's Cup...

Mel: draws a king
Mel: Okay, new rule:
Mel: Whenever you laugh, you have to snort.
Nico: wtf? :laugh: snort
Mel: :laugh: :laugh: snort
Everyone: :rofl: snort :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: snort :rofl:

August 18, 2007 (Day 1)

One of the most hectic, stressful mornings ever. While everyone else managed to board the ship on time, Samir & I drop off Coal & Finley, finish laundry, pack, drive to Miami airport, hail a cab and barely make it to the dock on time. Closing time is 3:00pm. We get there at 2:57pm. Damn you, Sam.

Boarding time takes over an hour, but we made it. All that stress and anxiety and standing in line makes us work up an appetite. Once on the ship, we make our first trip of many to the snack bar. Grilled onions and sauteed mushrooms, baaaby!

(Sidenote: This was the 2nd time in my life when I ate at least one burger, everyday for over a week.)

After lunch...chillin' and mandatory food coma.

A bit later, Daniel, Erol, Loren and Nico come by our room to wake us up.

Nico: [To Samir] What the fuck are you looking at, faggot?
Nico: ...
Nico: ...Samir?

Once everyone is up, it is time to -lose some money- hit up the casino!!

Two observations:

  • Erol makes losing money look like so much fun!
  • Techno music in the background makes you want to throw chips around like a robot.

This is officially the beginning of a terrible addiction...

August 19, 2007 (Day 2) -- Fun Day at Sea

This was our first full day out at sea. That means, lotsa sun, lotsa booze and lotsa girls in bikinis. But wait! We there's a Hairy Chest Contest!

Erol!!!!!

As hairy as Erol is, we anticipate that he'll be the underdog. We have to plan a little something extra so he stands a chance. I mean come on, there are some werewolf-hairy motherfuckers out there. We decide to give Erol an advantage...in the form of a sock, a banana and some crotch-cupping shorts. Fuck it, we throw in a Batman mask too.

The Batman mask is sweet, but it's covering up his chest too much. And the shorts aren't gay/european enough.

Perfect. Add the robe, a few stripper moves and we are good to go.

The competition looked alright.

Showtime, Erol!

Contest Host: Put your robe back on! There's kids around here!!!

Great show, Erol! Granny is fucking LOVING IT. The other girls are a little intimidated, but awesome job floppin' your banana.

Oh shit...who the fuck is this guy...

After a disappointing yet inevitable defeat, we spend the rest of the afternoon chillin' on the pool deck.

Soon enough, we have our first formal dinner.

Here's a sample of the type of food we have throughout the trip:

After dinner and a little pre-boozing, we head out to the Karaoke bar.

Compared to our past Karaoke excursions, this bar has a totally different vibe. The place was predominately black and it felt more like Showtime at the Apollo, focusing more on Mo-town type music. Over the course of James Brown impersonations, one-by-one we migrate over to the Piano Bar next door.

The piano guy, Garth, plays a good sport and lets us get as rowdy and drunk as we want. Hell, he even lets us take over the piano for a few songs.

We close the night with drunkness, gambling and of course, free room service.

August 20, 2007 (Day 3) -- San Juan, Puerto Rico

We spend the morning doing the pool deck thing.

We get a little productive and win the trophies for the Trivia Contest.

Then we got back to our perverted ways.

A few hours later, land ahoy!!

We get off the boat a little late but first thing we do is head out to Senior Frogs. We buy some Long Islands (extra long!) in thos gnarley yard stick glasses. The place is bumpin' with people and some typical spring-break-type contests. We eventually head out and check out the rest of Puerto Rico.

Niiiiice!

Nico: Uhh shit, has anyone seen Samir?

We spend most of the night looking asking tourists if they've seen an indian guy with a yellow visor. Then some of us say, "fuck it" and go play some pool at some Irish pub.

August 21, 2007 (Day 4) -- St. Thomas

We arrive at the beautiful island of St. Thomas.

"...No smoking, eating & drinking garbage allowed"

It was raining at first, but the sun came out and it became a perfect beach day.

We spend the rest of the day napping, recovering from sun burns, eating, boozing and gambling.

August 22, 2007 (Day 5) -- Fun Day at Sea

First thing in the morning...

Mel: on the phone
Mel: Hey, do you have any openings for a massage? 10:30? Sounds good.
Mel: hangs up
Alan: You're gonna get a massage by a dude again.
Mel: Fuck you.
Alan: Dude, think about it. They're not gonna allow that "happy ending" shit on a family cruise.
Alan: It's gonna be girl-on-girl, guy-on-guy.
Mel: Fuck you. I'm not gonna let you psych me out.

Fifteen minutes later of fucking with my head...

Mel: Fuck you, guys. I'll prove it.
Mel: calls Justin and Ariana's room
Mel: Yo Justin, you got a massage the other day, right?
Justin: Yah.
Mel: Was it by a chick or a dude?
Justin: It was a guy.
Mel: :uhh: Shit. Not again...

I was psyched out of my mind on the way to the spa, thanks to Alan, James and Samir. But you know what? My masseuse was a chick. A blonde chick from London. She was hot and she rubbed me down good. I rocked a raging woody in her face and I smiled, cuz it was a chick and not a dude! (Fuck you, bastards!)

Anyways.

One observation: there are a lot of kids on the ship, and they are hogging up the pools and jacuzzis. For the most part, we just lounge around. But one of us decides to take action:

Nico: splashes kid in the jacuzzi
7 year old: splashes back
Nico: splashes back harder
Nico: splashes harder
Nico: splashes harder and harder 'til kid goes running off to mommy

:rofl:

Anyways, the day was spent relaxing, a little more gambling and a lot more boozin'.

August 23, 2007 (Day 6) -- Private Island / Alan's Birthday

Just when I thought I've seen some beautiful beaches, we come to a private island off the bahamas. The sand is so soft, it feels like powdered sugar.

After spending the whole day at the beach, we get to party cuz it's Alan's birthday!!

How about a little throwback:

A little gambling action...

And a little bar action...

Oh yeah, let me tell you a story of how my room charges went from 0 to $180 in sixty seconds:

Mel: Ashley, let me buy you a drink.
Ashley: Thanks!
Mel: My pleasure! I...
Erol: interrupts...but what about me, Mel?
Mel: ( :squint: )
Mel: (Fucker! Now that's an extra $10 to my tab or you make me look like a dick in front of Ashley...)
Mel: Sure!
Erol: And what about her brother?
Mel: ( :mad: )
Mel: Sure...
Mel: Bartender! Long islands. Extra long!
Nico: I want one!
Loren: Get me one too!
Alan: Mel, get me a whiskey sour.
Mel: ( :mad: :mad: :mad: )
Mel: More long islands! And a whiskey sour! Extra long!
Mel: (There! Happy birthday, you fucking bastard!)

Once we got a good buzz goin', we hit up the club!

On the dance floor...

Mel: dances with Ariana and Ashley
Mel: checks out blonde Carnival staff chick
Mel: dances towards blonde Carnival staff chick
Blonde Chick: NO NO NO!!!
Mel: dances away from blonde Carnival staff chick

:rofl: [-100 Self-Esteem]

Man, that was so harsh it was funny. As the night went on, I noticed she was checking out Ariana, and the only people she danced with were girls.

She's a lesbian! [+100 Self-Esteem]

Anyways...mandatory bakla picture:

Mandatory Daniel-lighting-a-cigarette picture:

Mandatory drunken-Ariana-kissing picture:

Mandatory circle picture:

And we party the night away:

August 24, 2007 (Day 7) -- Nassau, Bahamas

For our final destination of the trip, we went site-seeing.

Atlantis!

Cruisin' in scooters!

Overall, it was a chill afternoon. Once we got back on the ship, we had our final dinner and hit up the casino floor.

Once midnight rolled around...Happy Birthday, Dan!

August 25, 2007 (Day 8) -- Dan's Birthday / Back in Florida

A couple hours after going to bed, we disembark back in Florida. We split up based on who's picking up who at the dock.

Alan, James, Samir and I spend the afternoon catching up on sleep, doing some errands, eating some Krystal's Burgers and chinese food. We chill at Samir's office for a bit, amusing ourselves with diabetic needles and such.

Later on, we meet at the infamous condo to play poker, chill and have more fun with diabetic needles.

We close the night with recapping all of the good times on the cruise.

Closing Thoughts

It's getting to that point in our lives where we've all graduated and started looking forward to our careers. We can't ask our parents to fund our vacations anymore, and we no longer have regular school vacations to work with. A lot of us had to pull a lot of strings with our bosses to make this work. It's hard to say when the next time we'll be able to get together for a big vacation like this.

Maybe our next big vacation will be our International Wives Tour, when all of us guys are ready to settle down. We'll travel the globe and stay in each country until one of us finds a wife, and then we move on to the next country. Hell, we should make a reality show out of it.

In the meantime, I look forward to any small weekend reunions that'll pop up.

Good food, good friends and good times indeed.

Randoms and Inside Jokes

  • Samir's gay sneeze
  • Australian BJ
  • "James looks like an asian banker."
  • "We're not gay. We're Saudi."
  • Samir showing us "the brain!!"
  • "Go go, Rummel arms!"
  • "If Russia attacks Turkey from behind, will Greece help?"
  • "Guys, remember the days when just looking at your hand would turn you on?"
  • "I call it my 'Tubesteak.'"
  • "Smeeeeellllll"
  • "Why don't they make thousand dollar chips?"
  • How all of us start using random accents when you put all of us in a room together.
  • LOL @ woman passed out at the dinner table
  • Sloppy Kisses

to...

  • Stacey and Rhode Island crew
  • "Cali" :naughty:
  • Hot girl at next dinner
  • Ashley and Jordan
  • Michael (room service), Scerel (maitre'd), Reynolds (waiter), Sacha (cocktail waitress) and the bakla filipino waiter with the awesome stripper moves.
  • Mexico City crew (that played volleyball with and made me a lot of money at craps)
  • Slavana, Claudia and the Carnival casino staff
  • Garth the Piano Guy
  • Hot russian girl in St. Thomas
  • "Amazon" and friend

Links

View All Pics on Flickr

the577

Email of the Year!!

From the Reunion '07 thread on the577.com:

Josh: Mel, is there something like a code name or group name we need to give the travel agent? You think she could give us better deals since you're getting ALL your friends to go...
Mel: The codename for our group is "It burns when I pee." Just tell her that and she'll know what it means.
Mel: Or you can just say "the reunion group" and she'll know.

A couple days later, Cathy emails the Travel Agent:

Hi, I would like to make a reservation for a cabin with our group. I guess I'm supposed to tell you that "it hurts when I pee"?

The travel agent writes back:

Hi Cathy, I presume you are talking about booking on the 8/18/07 Carnival Triumph round trip Miami to the W. Caribbean with Mel and Samir.

The cruise line doesn't really need to know about anyone's "pee" history, they do need to know if you need a wheelchair or oxygen or special diet though.

:bowrofl: :bowrofl: :bowrofl:

Diary the577

Surprise!! Sausage Fest: Florida!!

The Setup

Okay, here's how the whole surprise thing happened. (Props to Alan for organizing the whole thing.)

Alan & James tell Nico that they're flying in for the week. Josh.S doesn't know anything about it.

I tell Samir that I'm flying in. Nico & Josh.S don't know about me while Samir doesn't have a clue about Alan & James.

Dan tells Alan that he's flying in. Nobody else knows.

Nico convinces Josh.M to drive down (but has to tell him that Alan and James are flying in). Josh.M still doesn't know about Dan or me.

Surprise!!

A phone call out of the blue on Thursday, August 10th.

Dan: Yo Josh.
Josh.S: Yo.
Dan: What are you doing for the next hour?
Josh.S: Umm nothing.
Dan: Come pick me up.
Josh.S: I'm not in fucking texas, you dumb ass. I'm in Florida.
Dan: I know! Pick me up at Ft. Lauderdale!
Josh.S: ...sweeeet!!

Raging Nico leaves a voicemail for Samir after discovering his car is missing at 6am:

Nico: you motherfucking brown ghundu motherfucker! I can't wait for you to get back so I can kick your ass to the grass!
Samir: Dude, relax. Trust me.
Nico: I'm gonna fucking kill you!
Samir: Okay okay okay...we're at the airport picking up Mel.
Nico: Wait. Mel?

At the beachside apartment:

Melvin: knocks on the sliding door
Josh.S: fuck off, i'm sleeping!!
Melvin: knocks
Josh.S: fuck off!!!
Melvin: knocks
Josh.S: motherfucker!!
Josh.S: looks at sliding door
Melvin: :biggrin:
Josh.S: :uhh:
Josh.S: ...Mel?

August 12, 2006 (Day 1)

We get some chocolate pancakes and other stuff at IHOP then head over to Papa Shaners place. We pretty much just eat and catch up on sleep for most of the day.

At night we headed to Duffy's Sports Bar, where big man Sam is a regular.

After watching Samir get drunk, clear out the poker table and win the big prize ($50 gift certificate for beer), we head out to the Shaner's beachside condo for our own games of poker.

That's when The Party Foul happened...

While Drunken Josh was having surgery, we passed out.

August 13, 2006 (Day 2)

Sometime during early afternoon:

Dan & Josh.S: MEL MEL MEL WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!!!
Melvin: wait what huh?? who died??!
Dan: LESBIANS IN THE JACUZZI!!!!
Melvin: :noway:

That is hands down the quickest I have ever gotten out of bed. Ever. And since I'm the unofficial historian of the crew, it's my duty to take pictures and capture this God-given moment.

It was like having a religious experience.

Until they catch me red-handed. :oh:

Later on we get some breakfast at Denny's. It was outside of Denny's when James thought Drunken Josh deserves a new nickname. That very morning we hereby dub thee...Crazy Legs.

So we head over to the hospital to visit our good pal, Crazy Legs. Just when we find his room we see his bed is hidden behind the curtain.

Crazy Legs: ahhhhhhhhh... (in pain)

We watch the nurse come out of the curtain with a catheter at hand. Ouch. When the coast is clear, we finally see Crazy Legs.

Nico: How are you, man?
Crazy Legs: I'm okay...this makes me feel better
Crazy Legs: pushes morphine button

Since the hospital wouldn't release him, we head back to the house to relax.

Later on that night we head over to Jason's (smells like dog) house for some poker.

We call it an early night so we can get out early in the morning.

August 14, 2006 (Day 3)

In the morning we get up and head out to a secluded beach for some fishing and buttsex.

Victory!!

We end the afternoon victorious with three fish and a shark.

We spend the rest of the night eating shark & fish, abusing the dog and called it a day.

August 15, 2006 (Day 4)

Can't remember what we did during the day...but this night is one helluva night to remember -- Drunken Karaoke Night!!

Here's the gameplan:

  1. Beam/Rum & Coke (on the house)

  2. Tequila shots

  3. Yagers

  4. Don Perrion (for $245)

  5. Long Islands and other drinks

  6. Drunken Karaoke Time!!!

Sometime around the Don Perrion we got really hyped up. I was screaming a lot, especially when the fobby asian dude busted out his Elvis performance.

By the time we got up on stage, we were sloshed and lost our voices.

First up for the Sausage Crew:

Poison - Nothin' But a Good Time (Video)

Oasis - Wonderwall

Guns N' Roses - Sweet Child O'Mine

Mel's Drunken Tambourine Solo!!!

Def Leppard - Two Steps Behind

And I could've sworn we did a couple other songs...I can't remember. :oh:

For more drunken karaoke pics, check out their site.

After Karaoke we wandered around aimlessly into some other bars.

"SHWAR-MA!! SHWAR-MA!! SHWAR-MA!!"

August 16, 2006 (Day 5)

In the morning, Josh and James head out to pick up Crazy Legs from the hospital. We argue on who's gonna help give the recovering patient his first bath since the incident.

We make him clean himself instead.

Later on, we head out for a little round of golf.

A few hours later we head over to Duffy's for college night where we have a special guest appearance by Carissa!

We spend the rest of the evening at the beachside condo and call it a night.

August 17, 2006 (Day 6)

Things are winding down so we just chill for most of the day. We eventually head out to the smelly dog Karvois house where Jordan just arrived from Saudi.

A little beer pong action, a little smelly dog action, a little drunken singing action....and that's pretty much the end of Sausage Fest: Florida.

Good times.

Closing Thoughts

One of the best things about our crew is we always manage to see each other. Like Samir and I, we live on completely different coasts of the country. But over the span of the past 12 months we've seen each other 4 times (Julie's wedding, Sausage Fest: Santa Barbara, Samirfest and now Florida). How fucking cool is that?

Maybe its cuz most of us are still eligible bachelors or are still in school or don't have a job...but honestly, if those circumstances changed, I don't think that would matter to us anyways -- a long weekend is all the time we need.

Plus, we don't deal with that bullshit mentality of "if this person goes then I'll go." It's either "I can" or "I can't." If we can -- even if it means working extra hours beforehand, flying across the country, picking someone up at 5 in the morning, driving for 8 hours on the road, or bullshitting to the airline on how our grandma died so we can stay an extra few hours -- we fucking do it. We are passionate about seeing each other.

And that is what makes us the coolest motherfuckers ever.

Randoms

  • Alan: They should do a Fear Factor where they compete against an asian from a third-world country.
  • James: What did the black guy get on the SATs? BBQ sauce!
  • Josh.S: attempts to puke in a doggie bag but totally misses and gets it all over the dashboard
  • Nico: Okay, new game! The loser has to jump off the balcony! :rofl:
  • Dan: Maybe we need to take care of the big party fouls at the very beginning of the reunions.
  • Alan: We should permanently attach a morphine machine to Drunken Josh; whenever he starts to party foul we just push the button and he'll be like "I love you guys..."
  • Mel: This is what it's like to wake up next to me...
  • Samir: sings I'm the best...the beeeeeeest!! Nobody can beat me cuz I'm the best!

Links

the577

The Party Foul (Uncensored!)

Here's the collective story of everything that went down that night, exactly as it happened.

It's late at night, around 2:30 in the morning on just the first day of Sausage Fest: Florida. We get to Nico and Josh's beachside condo and decide to play a few hours of poker.

During the second round of poker (and my second game of poker ever), I sucker Josh S into going all in and then clean him out with a pair of aces. A bit later, I clean out Dan also. Josh M is a bit drunk too and goes all in on a really really bad bluff...so I clean him out too.

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