you know that thing where no matter how you hold a dollar bill, george washington's eyes will always be looking back at you?? and it doesn't just apply to dollar bills; its also paintings like the mona lisa and celebrities on magazine covers.

my roommate leaves magazines on top of the toilet. every morning when i go to the bathroom to fire my morning wood, i have to deal with that kinda thing. just look!!

look!! he's staring at me while i take a piss. he's giving me the "sexy" eyes as i stand there with my pants down and i'm aiming my penis...

stop it, colin!!! stop looking at me!!!