Kris Mark:
I've taken part in a pretty wide spectrum of romantic relationships with women. To say I regretted any one of them would be a lie—despite the numerous things that have occurred in my past that could be deemed morally unacceptable.
No, I didn't kill anyone. But I did manage to metaphorically bust a few hearts open. I was once (and only once) the cheater, the cheated on, the victim of denial, the perpetrator of lies, the lied to. I've had my fair share of situations that reinforce every cliché involving karma.
Girls have given me trouble. If anyone has ever gotten the notion that I was just always a ladies' man"¦I don't blame you.
No, don't gag. I'm totally kidding.
Actually, for as long as I've been interested in the womenfolk, I've been the long-term relationship kind of guy. Try that mentality out in middle school and early college—1% of girls are gaga over it. Not to mention, I was the dorky "nice" guy with zero game. I was no stranger to the we-should-just-be-friends stamp, or the why-doesn't-she-like-me-because-I'm-clearly-better-for-her-than-that-douche affliction. I even flipped that around at one point, trying my hand at being the jerk. I gave them trouble too. At first intentionally, then unintentionally. But as most movies involving fickle behavior as a motive of revenge would tell you: being someone other than yourself has its repercussions. I eventually lost sight of why I wanted a relationship. I wanted to find out what love really was. (Insert Foreigner's epic hook here.)
I temporarily gave into the idea of the entire idea of romance being a "game" or just a filler to a void, such that I fell from my high road of being patient for the perfect girl, while working to make myself the perfect guy for her in the meantime.
When I remembered what I wanted, that's when I found her. The girl who quite literally haunted my dreams for an incredibly long time.
I wasn't the charming, reformed suave machine with a clean slate that I had hoped to be once I met her. I didn't think I deserved a chance with a girl like her, but there it was. All I had to do was make sure there was nothing I would regret before I spoke to her. So, I did the most counterproductive, yet most effective thing anyone could ever do when meeting someone they could potentially fall in love with. I was myself.
Not the guy who wanted to fill a void. Not the guy who tried too hard. Just a guy with an incredible curiosity towards a great personality, smitten by the single most gorgeous smile he's ever seen.
Then it hit me—everything I've ever learned, every heart-wrenching situation a girl has caused, or that I've caused myself—all taught me to just remember the purity of why it all happened in the first place. Keep it simple, learn, and be patient. Everyone has their chance.
And honestly, I want every single guy out there to feel like how I feel for her.